A few new pics...

Okay I've been terrible about updating the blog - so much going on and little time to update the blog. So eventually I'll get around to posting about Sydney Kate's K-4 graduation, Sk first missing tooth, Eli is crawling, beach time, etc. But for tonight I hope these pics will give you an update of my cute little people. My friend Shanda took these when she was in town a few weeks ago. Enjoy and I promise I'll get back to blogging in the very near future!!!

This boy melts my heart....

Our family on Easter...

My 8 month old...

My precious boy - he is truly one of the happiest babies I've ever been around. He smiles at everyone - he goes with the flow no matter his mommy's crazy schedule. Eli's newest trick is to flash a big smile at those who pass to show off his first two teeth and then wave at them. He's so big everyone thinks he's so much older- who wouldn't at a whopping 24lbs. - more to squeeze! I love him so much and he brings so much joy to our family. Here's a few recent photos to show off our 8 month old enjoying this great Spring weather.

Theology reminders from a 4 year old....

During an afternoon shopping trip to TJ Maxx Sydney Kate found a small prize in the toy section that she really wanted. When she asked if she could get it I told her I would make that decision at the end of our shopping trip - if she was well behaved I might buy it. During our time of shopping she was the perfect child - Yes Ma'am mommy - I love you Mommy - You are the best Mommy in the world - I love your new hair cut - Am I being a good helper.... the list of "good" things goes on. So towards the end of our shopping trip I said to Sydney Kate... "You have been such a good girl today - I wish you were this good everyday even when you don't want a toy." Sydney Kate replied, "Mom, I'm not Jesus! He was good all the time but I'm not him."

Theology 101 from my four year old! My response: You're right we will never be perfect - I'm not Jesus either!

Marguerite Harvey Tucker February 29, 1924 - February 13, 2010

Amazing Grace how sweet the sound…

We sang this song at her funeral – it represents a life of a woman who imitated this hymn to those who were blessed to know her. She was not the type to go around “sharing her faith” as we might typically think about evangelizing – she shared her faith with love and action –she shared it by living out her life loving others as Christ loved her. As a child I remember going to Charleston to spend a few weeks with my Nanny every summer. I would play outside all day long with my cousin Kelly – but we always made it back to Nanny’s porch for some love and food. She would be there waiting for us on the big porch swing – we would lay our head in her lap and we would all swing –not many words were exchanged we would just listen to the birds singing – hear the swing’s old chains creak – and she would tickle our faces with her perfectly manicured nails (that she did herself I should add). We would lie there for hours – or it felt like hours when I was 9 years old – she loved us well. We would then run off and play until dark and return at dinner time to an amazing home cooked meal. Only Nanny could make any vegetable taste like dessert and you haven’t had dessert until you had her melt in your mouth pound cake. Memories there are many…

On those summer visits we always went to the local church on Sunday – New Hope United Methodist Church. For some reason as I child I thought that was such a big church – tall ceilings, lots of adults I didn’t know, and I would stand really close to my grandmother. As I entered this same church a week ago for her funeral I realized how small that church actually is – how in my mind as a child things seemed so grand and big. The reality is the church is quite simple and still very familiar – even 30 years later. I was in this church 10 years ago with my grandmother… she was dressed as a bride. Yes a beautiful bride in her 70s! I remember how excited I was for her – finding love once again in her life – living life to its full potential! That set a standard… love can find you no matter your age. My Nanny loved well. She loved her boys – they were her heart. She again set the standard – love your children – love them well.

I think of my grandmother’s legacy as she left this world… a legacy of love, strength, simplicity, and grace. May I never forget the love she poured abundantly on her family – she lived out the message of “love one another as our Heavenly Father loves us.” To me that verse was my precious Nanny - I will miss her.

Amazing Grace how sweet the sound that saved a wrench like me…I once was lost but now I’m found…was blind but now I see.

Snow in Alabama....

What a great day - snow on the ground, staying warm inside with a cup of coffee and chocolate and two happy children. Don't call DHR but I took Eli outside to take a few pictures - yes I realize he doesn't have a jacket on but he didn't mind! Sydney Kate had her friend Abby over this morning and they played in the snow and played barbies all morning - so Mommy got some alone time to just be quiet - much needed! Enjoy the pics.

Mid 30's here I come....

It's official - I'm pretty sure 34 years old = Mid 30 range. No more saying I just turned 30 (like you just left the 20's) - No more saying I'm in my early 30's. Nope I'm in the middle...and in another year or so I'll be crossing over the land into late 30's. I've noticed lately that I've been thinking of things that have never crossed my mind before - for example - I've found myself in the drugstore perusing the wrinkle cream section. One day I looked in the mirror and noticed lines on the side of my eyes! It could have been a sleepless night with an infant that caused these little lines or the more likely cause is I'm getting older!

I'm not sure I believe the hype of the old saying "You get wiser as you get older" - many days it just seems I'm slipping farther into the abyss of conformity... its easy - it doesn't take much brain power to do it - no one will think I'm weird - I'm tired. All the many excuses to remain in the comfort of what I know and too afraid to risk because failure looms on the other side. This has been in my thoughts all year and I do believe God keeps bringing it up in my life for a reason. Anytime I'm alone and all is silent (which is a rare event in my life these days) - God begins to show me how truly fearful I have been to step out of my warm comfy place. I was reading today in my new Brennan Manning Book (Souvenirs of Solitude) about this very idea of failure. Brennan writes, " Each of us pays a heavy price for our fear of falling flat on our faces. It assures the progressive narrowing of our personalities and prevents exploration and experimentation. As we get older, we do only the things we do well. There is no growth in Christ Jesus without some difficulty and fumbling. If we are going to keep on growing, we must keep on risking failure throughout our lives."

Wow - I'm so challenged by those words and I feel like a scared little child when I think about "risking failure". My mind immediately goes please Lord don't let me be a failure as a mother, please don't let me fail as a wife, and please don't let hardship interfere with me looking good to the outside world. Those thoughts are so absurd - so lifeless - so empty and if the truth be known I fail at these things hourly - the difference might be NO ONE really Knows! Ha! Not unless you are secretly hiding in my house somewhere.

So here's to year 34 - may you be dependent enough on Jesus to live fully -to do away with laziness, looking good, feeling good, and snuggling up to a boring existence where you don't risk - experiment - and love fully.

Here's a prayer written by Nikos Kazantzakis:
I am a bow in your hands, Lord.
Draw me, lest I rot.
Do not overdraw me, Lord. I shall break.
Overdraw me, Lord, and who cares if I break?

Cruising in my 5.0 Pink Mustang...

I have yet to upload my photos from Christmas but here are two that I took with my phone. As you see our little girl is now driving a pink Mustang - she speeds around here like she's been driving for years. I don't have time to write a post - packing for a night away (first night away from our boy). Heading to Atlanta tomorrow to cheer on the Tennessee Vols in the Chick-fil-a Bowl. We'll be bringing in the New Year at the Georgia Dome. Note to all readers - I am only a Tennessee fan when they are not playing the University of Alabama. It makes my husband happy to see me wearing orange so I concede for his benefit. Anyway, when we return I'll try to do a better Christmas post. Love to all!

My two little Christmas helpers...

Okay Eli didn't really help decorate for Christmas but he supervised. I just loved this picture - Sydney Kate was so excited about putting up the Christmas tree and her excitement was contagious for us all. A couple of Sydney Kate quotes lately:

" Mom did you know baby Jesus laying in hay is TRUE!"
" Hey mom I know a funny choke" you mean Joke my sweet girl
" I'm older now and turtle necks don't make me jag anymore" - some would say gag

I love my children.....

Thanksgiving...

Holidays for everyone can be kind of crazy but I have to say holidays with divorced parents can bring on a whole new kind of craziness. Both Todd and I have divorced parents which means we have 4 sets of parents (that's seven grandparents) to visit on any given holiday. In the beginning of our marriage we visited all the families in one holiday weekend! Talk about tired - we were worn out. So when Sydney Kate came into our lives we decided we just couldn't do it all and decided we could only do two families at a time. This year we spent the Thanksgiving weekend with my mom and dad. We had a great time - and you couldn't get more diversity if you tried! With my mom we braved Black friday in Atlanta and took the girls to the American Girl doll store. Amazingly it wasn't too crowded (God heard my prayers). The girls loved it! We had lunch in the bistro and then the dolls got their hair done in the salon. We finished off the trip with matching t-shirts for the girls and their dolls. Thanks Mom for a great trip! We then headed to my Dad's farm in Boaz, Alabama. The girls got a hay ride around the farm to see all the animals - we went fishing - fed the catfish, chickens, and the ducks. The highlight was ending our day roasting marshmellows and loving on Bubba (Dad's boxer). A great weekend had by all! I am very thankful for my family - it might be crazy to visit so many grandparents but its amazing how loved you feel when you have 7 parents/grandparents to love on you.

I'll be there late - trust me...

Seriously, this is my new major problem - I'm always late! My time management issues run deep - to get 3 people dressed and out the door in a reasonable amount of time seems almost impossible most mornings. I have noticed my children always look really cute - dressed nice - hair fixed - etc. However I'm looking HORRIBLE these days. I just throw on the same jeans almost everyday and hope there is a shirt halfway ironed in the closet. How does it all get done? Clean the house, go to the grocery store, wash clothes, feed the baby, color with the 4 year old, work, kiss your husband, email, and finally fall asleep at midnight! Is this the life we all dreamed about when we were single? Nobody warned us and even if they did I know I wasn't listening. I wouldn't trade my crazy life but sometimes I'm convinced I'll always be the mom who never gets it all together - well I think that's where God wants us anyway. I'm glad He accepts me as I am - wrinkled shirt and all!

A couple of blog worthy events...
1- Pumpkin Patch with good friends
2- My boy has the best smile ever!
3- My four year old daughter just asked me for a Snuggie for Christmas. Wow! I think Santa can make that happen... a blanket with sleeves is so practical for a 4 year old.
4- Had the flu over the weekend - took Eli to the doctor today because he was coughing. Thank God he does not have the flu but since I had it and he's coughing he is now on Tamiflu. I am terrified of him getting the flu this season!
5- Eli's best friend was just born - Ashley had a baby boy last week. Welcome to the world Harry!

My 9 month old - Oh I mean 11 week old...

Okay take a good look at those rolls - it takes hard work to get rolls like that and Eli has been perfecting those rolls for 2.5 months now. Yes people my little big guy is weighing in at 15 pounds - and really I haven't weighed him in a few days so he might even be up to 16 lbs. Apparently breast feeding is going well? Eli is an amazing little baby. He is so content and happy - we are getting lots of smiles and little sounds now. It is the best thing to look at your little one and get a big toothless grin! Priceless!! Eli is sleeping through the night most nights - last night it was from 11pm to 7am. They say bigger babies sleep better and I guess I believe them.

So If you need to squeeze a big, fluffy, round and happy baby come on over.... he is the perfect size to squeeze and kiss!!

The Ervin cousins...

We went to Chattanooga last weekend - based on tradition we always try to get a picture of all the cousins together. This is little Eli's first cousin picture. Aren't they all so cute!

Future Soccer Star?

Okay maybe she's not the star of the team but she's for sure the prettiest! And the only girl. During her second game I was telling her to try to kick the ball in net - she informed me "Mom I'm trying but they keep taking it away - and THAT'S NOT VERY NICE!" Yea, I see your point... okay you can play basketball instead - I know the rules of that game.

Life...

Lately it seems like all my days run together - one big blur for the last seven weeks! I love having my baby boy and my newborn doesn't look like a newborn much anymore... he's weighing in at 14.1 pounds!! So much for the 0-3 month clothes. Sydney Kate has been busy as well... she started K-4 and is going 4 days a week (only half days)... she shaved her legs for the first time (not very well evidenced by the 10 bandaides running down her leg... and on a daily basis she begs for us to buy her a puppy (which is not happening by the way!). So on top of all that fun I'm also getting back to work - which I'm pretty sure I never took a maternity leave from - but I'm offically getting back now. We've been in a building project all summer and it is almost complete - so we are going from being able to help 4 families to helping 8 families. My work life is about to be so very busy! Not sure how to balance life as a mom of a newborn and social worker of a big new program. If I talk about it too much I get a little stressed with how much needs to be done and how much hasn't been done. That's okay I'm a master at avoidance - I think I'll use my skills in this area to pretend like everything is perfect.

Well here's to Fall 09 - praying I get sleep sometime in the near future - hoping all my work gets done - praying my kids get a patient loving mom and Todd gets a more encouraging wife - and one last prayer...I would love to have a weekend away to hear the whisper of stillness! A girl can always dream...

Here's a few picture from our beach trip on Labor day with Nana and Grandad and cousin Paige!

Time to get out of the house...

There is only so many days one can stay inside the house - I'm not the sit around type - and so today we took an outing to the botanical gardens. It was a beautiful and hot day. I wanted a few good pictures and Sydney Kate had her heart set on playing in the fountains. A good day had by all! But the best part of the day was when we returned home I was able to get both children to nap at the same time - and then I heard the angels singing - and for a brief minute I thought to myself having 2 isn't so bad. I'll remind myself of that at 3am tonight:)

3 weeks old...

I can't type with one hand...

So I figured out that I can do many things with one hand - help my 4 year old get dressed, change the channels of the tv, check my email and read current events on the internet, etc. But I haven't mastered typing with one hand. So now you have the reason there have been no posts to the blog since Eli's arrival. Plus I've really actually been down two hands - I have this strange post pregnancy rash called "PUPPS" and it is so evil! It the worst thing I've ever experienced - it itches like crazy all the time and nothing helps! I've now gone through one round of oral steriods, two tubes of steriod cream, and every "natural" remedy I can find on the internet. I usually have a brush in one hand and a baby in the other - I use the brush to scratch my skin in hopes it will help in some twisted way. Thankfully Eli has been an amazing little baby. He seems happy most of the time and laid back. I don't want to jinx myself but he has slept 4 -6 hour spans at night. So even if I'm itching like a crazy person at least I have a sweet baby boy.